...go to the gym without Jared! AAHHH! I'm scared though. You see, I have to take off my wedding ring when I work out so I don't scratch it up on the weights and without my "funstopper" to flash in the faces of the fellow gym-goers, I have no way to deflect their glares that scream "You are a wus! Why are you here? That means you must be trying to find a mate. I'm a male. I could be your mate. Pant, pant!" It's hard enough just with my usual flailing and grunting against minimal poundage not to draw too much attention to myself, but I also make it a point not to make eye contact with anyone ever while there. This means I have to stare at the ground then ceiling, then the ground, then the ceiling with quick darting glances in between so I don't run into stuff. Then there's the awkward moments when you start approaching a machine you want and someone swoops in and you have to deflect like you didn't want to use it anyways and were actually heading to a different machine you don't even know how to use or what it's for. Always walking with a purpose so the crowd of exercise addicts around you doesn't think you're wasting their precious gym space.
Ok, I'm stopping right here, although I could go on, to add a funny from a co-worker. I just read this to my friend, John Decker who said, "But, you could also add 'without my funstopper, I do get to see that I'm still attractive and then figure out I could probably get all the machines I wanted without my funstopper'" to which I laughed pretty hard. Thanks.
24-Hour Fitness Hillsboro Rules!!!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
More posts! More posts! more posts! You always make me laugh!!!
Go get 'em tiger - you can do it, and don't stub your toe on the way to the work-the-muscle-group-you-never-knew-you-had machine while keeping your pretty blues on the the air ducts above!
I love you Sis!:o)
Post a Comment